Obituary

Lawrence D’Souza of Mississauga was on vacation in Goa, where he passed away. His funeral took places on Fri. 7 Mar in Navelim, Goa. The following is the eulogy delivered by his grandson, Mark Gonsalves.
 

FAREWELL TO OUR PAPA – LAWRENCE D’SOUZA – March 7, 2008 by Mark Gonsalves at Our Lady of Rosary Church, Navelim, Goa, India.

Thank you for coming to celebrate our Papa’s - Lawrence D’Souza’s journey to heaven. We really appreciate all of you taking time from your busy schedules and limited vacation time, and coming from all over Goa to be with us this afternoon at this Eucharistic celebration. Your presence this afternoon as we try to deal with our loss, our sorrow and vulnerability at a time when the relationship with the one we’ve cherished – our Papa, is severed through death, provides a source of great comfort to our family. We’ve all gathered here this afternoon at this Mass during the Lenten season to celebrate the Resurrection to new life of Jesus Christ, and how that mystery continues to affect the everlasting life of Our Papa.

A loving husband of 60 years to his dear wife Emilia, a loving father to his only daughter Cellie & husband Tony Gonsalves, eldest son Leo & wife Irene, his son Cassy and wife Olivia, and the youngest son Joe and wife Sarah. A tender Uncle to Olive, her husband Luciano and son Lesward, and a cherished grandfather to his nine grandchildren - Charmaine, Melissa, Andrea, Adam, Alyssa, Eric, Lionel, Shawn and myself.

While we mourn Papa’s death, we also celebrate his rich life and his presence now with God. Life has only changed, not ended and I know that we will see Papa again.

It is now five days since Papa left us and we’re still in a bit of suspended animation where time seems to stop as we focus on the one we cherish and love so deeply. This kind of stillness is how God lovingly helps to prepare us for absence. So, in a sense, for all of us the presence of Papa is everywhere and will always be in us.

As the 1st grandchild of 9, I have a very special relationship with Papa. In the front garden of my grandparent’s home at 1703 Chalkdene Grove in Mississauga, Ontario is where I have fond memories as a toddler playing football or soccer with my grandfather. He would challenge me to a one-on-
one match and dare me to score on him. We would play for hours in the hot summer sun. I would kick the ball with all my might but he would stop the ball every time. He would continue to encourage me to try again “All I ask of you Baba is to try your best.” he would say,” and everything will fall into place.”

As I got older, Papa would often challenge all of us - his grandchildren - with fascinating riddles, thought provoking puzzles and endless political discussions about world events. He enjoyed stumping us and making us try harder to think in ways no other school teacher could. Each one of us would come up with different solutions to each problem that he posed, but none of them was the answer he wanted and he would tell us to try again. His pealed with laughter every time we gave the wrong answer and he teased me and refused to give me the “right” answer. I can still see him laughing today as I struggled…. This is one way in which he instilled in all of us the values of perseverance and dedication, and they will remain in us forever.

Papa and I share a lot of the same hobbies – one of them was fishing. I have a lot of fond memories, being out in the open water, looking at my Papa with his fashionably titled hat, his collared Golf Shirt and shorts. He would carefully put the worm on my hook and say, “The next big fish is going to bite your hook Baba and we will have Fish curry for dinner.” His love for fishing days dates back to his time in Dar-es-Salaam when he enjoyed fishing with his special fishing buddies. One of them was Mr. Francis Cabral who passed away on March 3rd, one day after my Papa. Our sympathies to Mr. Cabral’s wife Ivy and their family – I know the sorrow that they are experiencing. Though Papa and Mr. Cabral did not meet during the 17 days Papa was in Goa, they shared one last event together – Mr. Cabral’s mass is at 3:30 p.m. today – half hour after this mass for Papa.

Papa enjoyed many different activities. One of his favorite pastimes was singing. Sitting alongside him and my grandmother during Mass was a special treat for me. I was able to pray with both my grandparents as well as listen to Papa’s voice as he was sang his favorite prayer - the Our Father. Papa would tell me that the Our Father has everything in one prayer that you could ever want. It deals with all aspects of life, death, resurrection and ascension into heaven.

The mystery of saying goodbye to a loved one is really the mystery of the Ascension. The Ascension is about our loved ones leaving us so that they can fully receive the Holy Spirit. It is about the mystery of saying goodbye when goodbye isn’t really goodbye at all, but only loves way of taking on a different modality so that LOVE can be present in a way that’s deeper and more pure, more permanent and with us forever.

Papa, you once told me that there were only two places you wanted to visit before you passed from this life to the next – they were Jerusalem and Goa. Papa visited the Holy Land several years ago and came to Goa this time after an absence of 37 years. Papa, I am happy that both of your wishes were fulfilled. I thank God for you being in my life and loving me like only a grandfather could. So let us all be at peace that Papa is as stated in the words of St. Paul “With the Lord forever.”

Papa, I want you to know that we will never forget you - you will be with us forever in mind, and spirit. You are very, very precious to all of us. I am honored to have you as my Papa and I will always love you.